I call it a confusing battle because I don’t think I’m entirely sure on who or what I am battling against. I’m familiar with autoimmune diseases as both my mother & sister have severe thyroid problems; that would be a battle against your own body. But, I am only battling against my own body if I say that my health problems have taken over my body, and in that sense, there is no battle.. It would mean that the battle has been and gone, because that is when my health problems have become me.
Also, in a way, I’ve been confused from the start. For so long, in my teen years, I was so ill and severely fatigued, but doctors didn’t know what was wrong with me.. There was never a name or a diagnosis. It took, roughly, 5 years to get anywhere close to a diagnosis of Fibromyalgia & Chronic Fatigue Syndrome.
My family have always tried to make light of the situation by saying that I don’t do things by halves. I’ve had thyroiditis, which lead my GP to invite all of his fellow doctors into the room to feel my thyroid, as they would never have come across this before; I’ve had tonsillitis so severe that it ate away one of my tonsils; more recently, I’ve been diagnosed with chondromalacia which means that the cartilage in my right knee has worn down so much that I’m in agony, struggle to put weight on it and can actually feel the bones grinding. The irony of chondromalacia is that it’s also known as ‘runners knee’. I was active in my teenage years, but if you know much about fibromyalgia and emphysema, you’ll know that there’s very little chance of me breaking out into a bloody run. I couldn’t breathe for laughing when I found out it’s alternative name, but I guess we’ve got to find the light somewhere.
As you can tell, and only by my second post, I ramble and I get carried away with myself. But, I promised to be honest, and I can only do that by being true. I’m a rambler…